April 4th

Happy birthday world!
FUCK you.
...
I'm pretty mad, pretty sad.. it's pretty bad sometimes. Wish I could go back to the past sometimes.
Sometimes things aren't fine when you wine and you dine and you dine and you whine, then trying to not blow up inside, but the tears you've cried cannot be dried
It's impossible.

Everyone has lied, at one time or another. But there is no worse when it's your brother, your best friend, your lover..

Actually it's worst when it's you
Because you're the only one who hasn't thought it through, by doing the things you ought not to do. It's true.

When you convince your mind of these lies, the ones you hide from honest eyes who try to try to help you, the ones who know you, show you that the growing pattern you've discerned is not your best.

When you're drinking too much, smoking too much, thinking and sinking too much

Man...it's awful.
And you're thinking too much. On the brink of it much and you're joking around too often...
And you excuse yourself from the things you so easily judge others for
And you simultaneously close up all your doors
Till you have nothing left but your own face
That looks at you with poor taste
And you're trying and trying and lying
And you're lying and lying, defying yourself, regretting yourself till you're sweating your health until you are dying.

And your mind builds a closet to push what defeats us, in the back of the back in the place that the deepest

And we ignore and excuse and blame because we can. Then we demand and demand and demand. What plan of plans could or can give the upper hand which stands greater than we could ever stand?

Happy birthday world.

Fuck you!!

I told what you couldn't do. The truth.

I realized that my lying eyes were dreadful
And to accept that was quite a headful..
But if I say I feel one way no matter the way
I wish to stay at bay with excuses..
And to give up MY life?
I refuse this!!
So I'll lie and not lie. Then try to survive the tide I've been siding by.
Not I. No. Not i!